![\"\"](\"https:\/\/rickzullo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/04\/Luca_Brasi.gif\")
<\/p>\nOK, it\u2019s time for the next installment in my ongoing effort to force the English language down the throat of Italy like so many McDonald\u2019s hamburgers. Today I\u2019d like to clear up an area of particular confusion amongst Italian learners of English.<\/p>\n
The topic that I want to \u00a0address is the distinction between countable and uncountable nouns.\u00a0 Indeed, I feel somewhat indirectly responsible for this mess, being of Italian-American background.\u00a0 My ancestors were among many who insisted that their children speak English, while refusing to teach them proper Italian.\u00a0 The messy result led to poor grammar skills in subsequent generations. Let me use an example to explain\u2026<\/p>\n
Many Italians are confused when I tell them that the word \u201cfish\u201d is used both in the singular and the plural\u2014one fish, two fish, a hundred fish.\u00a0 \u201cBut why then,\u201d they ask, \u201cdoes Luca Brasi sleep with the fishes<\/b><\/i>?\u201d<\/p>\n
Well, as I\u2019ve already alluded to, it\u2019s because those early Italian immigrants received very poor language instruction, both at home and at school. \u00a0They (logically) assumed that all plural words in English should end in an \u201cs.” \u00a0In Italian, you say one \u201cpesce<\/i>,\u201d two \u201cpesci<\/i>.\u201d \u00a0Makes sense, right?\u00a0 But perhaps they just didn\u2019t want to believe that such a \u201cperfect\u201d country could have such an imperfect language.<\/p>\n
So then why does Fat Clemenza make the opposite mistake and say, \u201cLeave the gun, take the cannolis<\/b>?\u201d\u00a0 In fact, he makes a much worse mistake by keeping the Italian word and Americanizing it by adding an \u201cs.\u201d (Yes, I watched the clip ten times on YouTube and he definitely adds an \u201cs.\u201d) \u00a0Che vergogna! \u00a0<\/i>I think it\u2019s fair to say that he wasn\u2019t the most studious goombah<\/i> at school.\u00a0 And judging by his considerable girth, he\u2019s obviously eaten too many American-style cannoli. \u00a0Doppia vergogna!<\/em><\/p>\n I\u2019m getting off topic here, as is my tendency.\u00a0 Let\u2019s focus on some actual rules for a moment instead of my inane anecdotes.<\/p>\n As the name would suggest, countable nouns are words\/things which can be counted. \u00a0They always have a singular form and a plural form. \u00a0Most countable nouns are made plural by adding an \u201cs\u201d or \u201ces\u201d to the end of the word. One meatball, many meatballs; one dish, many dishes.\u00a0 There are, of course, exceptions to this rule, as our friend Luca Brasi (riposa in pace<\/i>) can attest to.<\/p>\n Conversely, uncountable nouns are words\/things which cannot be counted and so they only<\/i> have a singular form. \u00a0These words are treated as \u201cwholes\u201d rather than as individual parts. \u00a0They often refer to concepts like intelligence or energy; or collective groupings like traffic or clothing.<\/p>\n A good illustration here is the word \u201cinformation.\u201d\u00a0 In Italian, they can make this word plural by changing the final vowel (informazione —> informazioni).\u00a0 This would sound very awkward in English.\u00a0 Take this typical conversation for example:<\/p>\n \u201cMadonna<\/i>, I\u2019m not digesting my lunch very well, the mozzarella is making me gassy.\u00a0 And now I need to use the bidet<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThanks for sharing, Giorgio, but that\u2019s way too much information<\/span> for me.\u201d\u00a0 Notice I didn\u2019t say \u201cinformations<\/b>,\u201d because this word is always uncountable, and therefore singular, in English.<\/p>\n Speaking of eating, certain types of foods and drinks (and \u00a0most liquids in general) are considered uncountable in English, for example: meat, cheese, soup, oil. \u00a0But you have to be careful with this one, because it can change according to context.<\/p>\n You could ask, \u201cCan I have some more wine?\u201d but you wouldn\u2019t say, \u201cCan I have some more \u2018wines<\/b><\/i>\u2019?\u201d However, wine becomes countable when put into a container. \u00a0\u201cWaiter, can I have two more glasses of wine?\u201d\u00a0 So now \u201cglasses of wine\u201d become countable\u2014that is, until after the fourth or fifth glass when counting becomes superfluous…or even cognitively impossible.<\/p>\n To blur the topic further, there are some words that look like the plural of a countable noun, but are actually uncountable, and therefore always singular.\u00a0 For example, the word \u201cpolitics.\u201d\u00a0 We say that we discuss \u201cpolitics,\u201d not \u201ca politic,\u201d right?\u00a0 But as in our example with wine, politics can be made countable by placing it in a different context. \u00a0 So while \u201cpolitics\u201d is uncountable, \u201cpolitical parties\u201d are countable.\u00a0 Except in Italy, of course, where even the latest computer algorithms have failed to quantify all the various alliances and sub-factions.\u00a0 So maybe that\u2019s a bad example.\u00a0 Anyway, moving on\u2026<\/p>\n More confusing still are the words which can be either countable or uncountable depending on their usage.\u00a0 For these, relevant examples are always enlightening (and not just for their grammatical significance).<\/p>\n Room<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n Countable: \u201cHow many rooms<\/b> do you have in your apartment?\u201d<\/p>\n Uncountable: \u201cEven when the metro is so full that the doors aren\u2019t able to close, many Romans still believe that there\u2019s room<\/b> for one more person.\u201d<\/p>\nCountable and Uncountable Nouns<\/h2>\n
![\"countable](\"https:\/\/rickzullo.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/04\/IMG_1522-300x300.jpg\" "\\"In")
<\/a>Don\u2019t get me started on politics again<\/h2>\n